French Parenting

I read an article about this book that has been recently published about french parenting style.

Bringing Up Bebe - by Pamela Druckerman

This little radio clip is a nice little highlight.


http://www.cbc.ca/thecurrent/episode/2012/03/16/bringing-up-bebe/#


Generally I'm not a big fan of parenting books, hence why I haven't purchased the book. However, the highlights I got from the article, along with this radio clip were good and a nice reminder. Many of the things we already do with Elly, which was a nice thing to see. But also a nice reminder to keep it up because it's worth it.

One of the things I found most interesting and worth considering integrating into our lifestyles is a simple "Bonjour", or for us "Hello". Basically, the author said one of the things french parents are most neurotic about manners and ensuring that their children say "Hello" when they are introduced into a new situation.

The author went on to say that by encouraging and making it a requirement for children to acknowledge other children and adults with a Hello, they learn that a) they're not the only person in the room and the world doesn't revolve around them and b) respect.

This makes complete sense to me. COMPLETE SENSE. I remember this was one of those things that we had to do as kids. There was no hiding, playing shy or ignoring. We always had to say hello.

I also recognize, that this simple courtesy is something we haven't enforced with Elly. Often because she has taken to being shy and hiding behind me in new situations. So, it's something we'll have to add to our "work on" list. Not for the sake of overcoming shyness, but for the sake of respect, courtesy and manners.

Check it out the clip, see if you can find an article on the book and let me know what you think. Is this just common sense stuff? Or one of those you'd think it was common but isn't kind of moments.

We've got our Appointment

I received notice in the mail today. We've finally got our official appointment for sick kids booked!

Hooray. It'll be 4 days after my last class for school and a couple of days before our grad show. It'll be a busy time, but at the same time, it should be perfectly doable without issue and distraction.

The ball is rolling.

Feels good.

Her Buds

Elly with her best buds on a beautiful Spring Day!

STICK TO IT!!!!!!!!

One of the best pieces of parenting advise I ever got was "stick to it" whatever it is you say or do, or rule you make - Follow Through. No excuses, no exceptions, just do it.

As most parents will know, it's tough. Patience runs thin, tempers run high, desperate for sanity and silence we crack and say Fine. It happens. But I can honestly say, it's rare when it happens here. When my workload is on overflow, my sleep has been minimal and all I can think about is everything else going on outside of that moment and that little girl in front of me, it's damn hard to stick to my guns and not give into her tears or whining and pleas for whatever it is that she wants that I said no to.

Damn hard.

But I tell you, the hard things, if you stick through them, the end results are always so worth it. Parenting isn't just about fun, imagination, bubbles and tickles. It's not just about cuddles and cuteness. It's about a commitment we've made to these little people to help build their foundation, so they can grow into amazing people one day.

Commitment to ourselves, commitment to them, a commitment to following though. When we started our potty training nearly a year ago, it took a lot of commitment on my part to learn her behaviours and be committed to stoping whatever we were doing to ensure her success. And really, I think ultimately it took about 4 weeks and we were on our way. Had we have waited, maybe it could have been less time, but I'm telling you, you have NO IDEA how grateful I am that I don't have to change a diaper anymore.

Rules and routine.

Rules are rules in our house. The biggest one is that a whiny kid NEVER gets what she wants. This doesn't mean that she never gets anything, it just means we have been slowly helping her understand that if she whines, she doesn't get her request. We calm her down until she's behaving, then we will accommodate - assuming, she's cooperating. Now that she's gotten the concept, we are less likely to help her calm down and get herself in order. We reminder that whiny kids don't get things and she's getting better at calming herself. Watching her "pull herself together" is pretty funny though, but remarkable at her will power at 2.5yrs old.

I can't remember what led to it, but this afternoon she was told that if she didn't behave she wouldn't get a story before her nap time. When nap time came and she wanted her story read to her, I reminded her that she hadn't been listening and that she lost her privilege for her story. She got upset, which then lead to the crying kids don't get what they want spiel. Which lead to more tears, then the explanation that if she wanted to read her own story, she could, but the rule was that Mommy wasn't going to read her a story, because she wasn't listening.

She eventually calmed down and opted out of reading any story and just had her nap. It was amazing though to take a step back and see that our efforts to follow through on our rules really is paying off. She gets it, she's learning to accept it and it was an incident like this afternoons that really kind of emphasized the benefits and success of our efforts to date.

Following through is tough stuff and more often then not always takes longer then giving in, but I'm telling you - don't crack. Stick to it. Follow through. The benefits are sooooo worth it.

I think the past few days have truly shown us that Elly understands the tone and concept that come with these rules. She knows that when we go to that place and tell her what's not going to be happening, or if I threaten to take away something if she doesn't listen, that we will follow through.

The key is not just to set her up to succeed though, but to set yourself up to succeed. Whatever the rule, the threat or the consequence, make sure it's realistic and is something you're willing to commit to too. First buy in has to be from you, because if you fail, then so will they.

I love that she has Friends

We have been very fortunate to have made friends with some lovely Moms and kids Elly's age from very, very early on. I feel so lucky to have these ladies in my life, along with their families. Our kids originally spent time together, because we spent time together. But now, it's them who are building their friendships and it's so incredible to watch.

Elly looks forward to seeing her friends so much so, that we could probably hang with them everyday and she'd be cool with that. In fact, she'd likely be thrilled. She asks for her friends by name daily. Somedays so much so that it drives me a little nuts when I have to explain to her for the 50th time that they're at their houses or sleeping, or whatever other story I make up that makes them unavailable. Regardless, of the million questions though, I love that she loves having friends and that they are all starting to interact with each other, more and more each day.

Spring weather has finally blessed us and we took full advantage of it today and was fortunate enough t o have the paparazzi join us :)

She played in the sand box for nearly 45 mins... most of the sand is still in the box.

She's so dishevelled, but I love it.

Racing on the slides with her friend Alyssa

Chillin on the stairs, just having a conversation. They may have been negotiating who got to go up or down.

I love the look of pure happiness on her face

Getting ready to race. I love these two.

A little crouch down on my part and voila, she looks like she's gonna fall out of her swing - lol. But really, she loves to "fly" and well, I don't blame her. I love that she loves this... most of the time.

I love friendship in little ones.

These guys are just too cute

Just holding hands and having a conversation... why not?

Video

A little glimpse into life with Elly and all silly things she does.

A bunch of stuff Before I forget

I've been working INSANE hours for the past week. So much so, that Saturday nights objective was to get my work done before the sun got up. I went to bed at 5:00am. Woke up 4.5hrs later and worked and off till Elly went to bed and I carried on till 12:30am. All that after an average bedtime of 1am last week.

So ya.

Busy.

And trying to remember to write stuff down. Here's the Cole's Notes.

My conversation with Elly the other night before bed.

"Mom, suck my finger."
      "Why? Where was it?"
"Up my nose."


Elly passed Swimming last week and we move onto the next round... assuming I remember to register her.

Got our letter from Mac that the referral to sick kids went through.

Elly's got some weird thing going on with drinking out of cups at other people's houses right now. It's all about going to someone else's house just so we can use their cups, then talk about it for days on end. Kinda driving me nuts.

Pictures from yesterday

Little Miss Mischief

Aspiring Basketball player

First Slide of the Season

Breaking out the backyard toys

A few spring repairs

Happy to see her Dad

Just being pretty.

Funny Faces

Tonights dinner table entertainment - Elly sticking her fingers in either side of her mouth, stretching out her face and saying ah-ya-ya-ya.

Jeff had been awake for nearly 36 hours following a business trip. Me, well, I just survived an exceptionally emotional week while he was away.

So we laughed. She laughed. And at that moment in time, everything was as it should be.

What a kid.